Grandma Awesome

I spent an hour trying on jeans this morning.

I hate trying on clothes, jeans especially because every darn brand has a different scale system meaning that I can’t just grab a handful of size 7s and wing it, I have to grab 5s, 6s, 7s, 8s, 9s, and 10s and hope that I managed to match the brand of “We are going to make our sizes small to make you feel better” with the right number and the “We only do odd/even numbers to mess with your head… they really have no bearing on your waist size at all hahahaha” group.

After failing miserably with jeans I tried on dresses, skirts, sweaters,a nd tops… all of which took their turns getting tossed into the “reject” pile on the dressing room bench.

Needless to say I left the store disgruntled and feeling fat, flabby, and frumpy.

A few hours later I was watching Castle in a coffee shop (my apartment is without power while the PG and E guys make all sorts of fun noises all up and down my block) and still feeling slightly body conscious and quasi body issue depressed. I sipped my decalf white mocha (with nonfat milk and no whipped cream) and nibbled on my organic yogurt with fruit and granola while trying to ignore the pastries and cookies that taunted from the other side of the room.

On my computer screen the delightfully yummy Nathan Fillion (Castle on the aforementioned show) has a scene with his 15 year old daughter… trying to help her pick out a dress for prom. He keeps telling that she is beautiful and she keeps telling him he isn’t helping. Her grandmother (one of the best parts of the show played with charm and spot on perfection by the beautiful Susan Sullivan) enters and tells Daughter that the dress she is currently wearing is horrible, giving her something else to try on.

Castle is perturbed, “Do you want to give her body image issues?” he asks.

Her response is one of the best summations of women and body issues that I have ever heard… here it is:

Grandma Awesome: “Newsflash, she already has body image issues. It’s an intrinsic part of being a woman. Every woman in the world has issues. There is always some part of her that she absolutely hates; her hands are too small, her feet are too big, her hair is too straight, too curly, her ears stick out.. “ (glancing at herself in the mirror and giving herself a playful smack on the rear), “.. oh god, her butt is too flat, her nose is too big… and you know, nothing you can say will change how we feel. What men don’t understand is that the right clothes, the right shoes, the right make up, it just hides the flaws we think we have. They make us look beautiful to ourselves, and that’s what makes us look beautiful to others.”

Spot on Grandma Awesome, spot on.

Published by kayliametcalfe

Queer,loudmouth,skeptical-agnostic-pagan,book addict,coffee lover,wine drinker, SAHM,writer,editor,producer,podcaster. -She/her

3 thoughts on “Grandma Awesome

  1. A few years ago I was trying on clothes and not liking anything. I left the dressing frustrated and thought I hate my body. I stopped and said to myself this has been going on for fifty years. I hated it when I weighed 110 and I hate it at 150. I have tried to stop hating and it has helped my body image.


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